Hee hee hee hee! Short story #2

Published September 2, 2009 by Eli Stutz


Hee hee hee hee

My name is Lori.

I live in an especially messy house.

There are clothes on the floor. The beds are not made. The dishes are not washed. And there are toys everywhere.

But my family doesn’t mind it one bit.

Whenever someone makes a mess my Mom and my Dad say, “Hee hee hee hee”.

They think that it’s funny.

One time my little brother Zack came into the living room with a cup of chocolate milk.

He climbed up on the couch to see the story I was reading.

When he looked over my shoulder, all of the milk spilled out on me, the book, and the couch.

There was even chocolate milk in my hair.

My Mom and Dad looked up from their books.

They smiled at each other and they said, “Hee hee hee hee.”

I had to clean up everything all by myself.

Last week I brought a newspaper article to my Mom. She was in the kitchen making dinner.

The article was about something scientists had discovered.

They had discovered that it’s not healthy to leave dishes on the counter without washing them.

They said that this makes bacteria grow in the kitchen, and that it could make a person sick.

There were dishes on the counter and in the sink that had been there for 2 weeks.

My Mom looked at the article. Guess what she said?

“Hee hee hee hee.”

Last night I had a dream that I was swimming in a pool of yogurt.

The yogurt felt icky on my skin and I was trying to get out.

I woke up and found that part of my dream was true.

Zack had climbed into my bed. He does that sometimes when he’s scared.

But this time he had brought a cup of strawberry yogurt with him.

Then he had fallen asleep. Now we were both covered in yogurt.

I screamed.

My Dad came in and turned on the lights.

He said, “Hee hee hee hee.”

That was the last straw.

I decided to move.

My friend Joshua lives across the street.

His house is not super clean, but it’s much, much, much, cleaner than our house.

I called him up after school.

“Joshua, can I sleep over at your house tonight?” I asked.

Joshua asked his mother and she said, “Ok.”

Joshua’s mother is really nice.

I packed up my bag with some clothes and my toothbrush. Then I went over to Joshua’s house.

I left a note for my Mom and Dad. I taped it to the front door. The note said:

“Dear Mom and Dad,

I can’t live in your house any more.

It’s too messy for me.

I have decided to live at Joshua’s house from now on.

I will try to visit you sometime.

Thank you for raising me.

Your daughter,


Joshua and I played hide and seek. Then we did arts and crafts. We had lots of fun.

Later, Joshua’s mother made us spaghetti and meatballs for dinner. I love spaghetti and meatballs.

Joshua’s little sister dropped one of the meatballs on the floor.

Joshua’s mother and father said “Oy, oy, oy”.

Joshua’s father cleaned it up in less than one minute.

That’s the way things should be, I said to myself.

After dinner we played checkers.

Joshua’s little sister also wanted to play.

So she put her hand on the board and pushed all the pieces around.

Joshua said, “Oy, oy, oy.”

Then Joshua’s father showed us how to build a house out of cards.

It was cool – he built the house three stories high.

But then by accident I touched one of the cards and the house fell down.

Joshua’s father said, “Oy, oy, oy.”

I thought about my Mom and Dad.

They had probably read the note.

I wondered what they were saying.

Were they sad? Were they mad?

I didn’t think so.

They were probably saying, “Hee, hee, hee, hee.”

I decided to find out.

I told Joshua’s mother that I needed to get something from my house.

I crossed the street and crept up to the window.

I looked inside.

I couldn’t believe it!

My Dad was vacuuming the living room carpet.

My Mom was washing dishes in the kitchen.

Even Zack was helping. He was putting toys away.

I knocked on the door.

My Mom opened it.

“Hi Lori,” she said.

“Hi Mom,” I said.

“So what’s it like to live at Joshua’s house?” she said.

“It’s ok,” I said.

“I see,” she said.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“We’re cleaning up the house,” said my Mom, “it was a little messy.”

“I see,” I said.

“Would you like to help us?” asked my Mom.

“Sure,” I said.

They really needed my help.

After such a long time of living in a messy house, they had forgotten how to clean up.

I showed my Mom how to scrub the grime off the bottom of a pot.

I showed my Dad how to shake the dust out of a dusty carpet on the porch.

I showed Zack how to fold up his T-shirts and pants.

Two hours later the house was looking pretty clean.

We could see the living room floor for the first time in years.

There were no more dirty dishes on the counter or in the sink.

All the toys and clothes had been put away.

I decided to stay at home that night. I called Joshua and told him.

“That’s ok,” he said. “You can sleep over another time.”

Of course my house didn’t stay clean for long.

The next morning Zack dropped an egg on the kitchen floor.

But my Mom gave Zack a paper towel and made him clean it up.

Then I looked at my Mom and my Mom looked at me.

And we both said, “Hee, hee, hee, hee.”

My house is a lot cleaner than it used to be.

It’s not like Joshua’s house, but at least you can see most of the floors,

And some of the toys are always put away.

It’s cleaner because almost every night we clean it up – a little.

We even clean up messes right after they happen – usually.

But we still say, “Hee, hee, hee, hee.”


2 comments on “Hee hee hee hee! Short story #2

  • Love it, Eli! Very entertaining . . . Really very guilt-relieving for those of us with homes cleaner than Lori’s, but possibly dirtier than Joshua’s . . . .

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